Rewind 1 year ago and my life was so very different from what it is today.
My job at Go Real Europe as a Destination Developer meant I was traveling to new cities in Europe every 2 weeks. It was a hectic schedule that took me away from home a lot but I loved it, especially since it allowed me to work remotely and visit some incredible places I had always dreamed about.
In April 2018 I was also busy preparing for my Miss Adventure trip to Istria in Croatia, something I had been looking forward to for months. It was a group trip with around 10 other female bloggers and Instagrammers that aimed at teaching you how to become a better Instagrammer and lady boss and of course make new friends. It was the ultimate girls trip and I had such a great time!
Over the course of 5 days, I learned so many new skills that I could apply to my blog and social media, met and made friends with some incredibly inspiring women and gained so much confidence in my work and my abilities that I was eager to return home and begin implementing all that I had learned.
The women’s ages on this trip varied from the early twenties to late thirties, and while I wasn’t a complete noob, it appeared most of the girls had far more experience in the Influencer game than I had. A few of them were already very successful and were earning a living traveling around the world and living the influencer life we all dream about. I sat there in awe and thought “this is the life I want and the dream I want to achieve”.
Of course, over dinners and drinks, conversations arose about how some of the women manage to balance their home family lives with their job and travel. Since none of them had young babies or young children, it didn’t seem to bother them and they said it wasn’t as hard as people make it out to be. When asked about whether I was planning to have children, I, of course, replied yes! In fact, my husband and I had been trying to conceive since January 2018 but had no luck by April. We weren’t in any kind of rush and to be quite honest, although I had long desired to have children, the concept was quite frightening. But I was reassured that there were plenty of nomads, bloggers and successful business women out there who achieved both a family and a career, so I put it to the back of my mind and that was that.
Fast forward to July
They say you fall pregnant when you least expect it and that couldn’t be truer. I traveled to Rome at the end of June for a week and when I returned home I was relaxed, refreshed and was already planning my next adventure to Switzerland and Germany. A week after my return while sitting at work, I suddenly felt very very sick. A gut instinct made me run to the nearest pharmacy and purchase a pregnancy test. I went straight home to take it. In the midst of all my traveling, my mind was no longer thinking about conceiving, and murphy’s law – that is exactly what happened. In less than a minute, the words “Pregnant” appeared. I was both incredibly happy and incredibly scared.
Traveling while pregnant
I was a little worried about traveling while pregnant. You hear stories of early miscarriages and people advise that you shouldn’t fly in the first 3 months. During my first two months of pregnancy, I felt fine, a little sick but nothing too horrendous. We traveled to London to announce the news to my family and whilst I was certainly felt more tired from traveling than normal, the trip went fine and we returned to Prague where I then had a few days to prepare and pack for my trip to Switzerland for work.
In the days leading up to Switzerland, everything changed. The days were a blur. I could barely manage to get out of bed, eat or look after myself properly. I lost 3kg in a week and could barely get myself dressed some days. Who knew such a tiny human (the size of a grape at the time) could make you feel so awful?!
Reluctantly and regretfully, I had to cancel my trip to Switzerland last minute which was a huge blow. Switzerland had been on my bucket list for years but my inner maternal self was telling me I had to rest. I had to start putting the baby first.
Dealing with the transition – an emotional rollercoaster
Travel has been a huge part of my life for the past 14 years. I was constantly hopping from plane to plane, city to city. I lived for travel. But falling pregnant changed everything. Thanks to mild sickness and some small pregnancy complications, I was no longer able to live the YOLO lifestyle I was enjoying so much. I was so grateful and happy to be pregnant but so resentful that I was no longer able to travel, to enjoy the sense of freedom traveling gave me. I felt like a caged animal on a leash, tied to my desk at work and my bed at home.
Pregnancy certainly hasn’t been the walk in the park I always thought it would be. For the past 7 months, I have been leading my life from doctors appointment to doctors appointment, going to the office when it has been physically possible and spending copious amounts of time on my sofa watching Netflix (THANK GOODNESS FOR NETFLIX!). Due to sickness, I didn’t gain any weight until my 5th month of pregnancy, but you can bet your bottom dollar my body made up for it in the last 4 months, gaining a staggering 25kg. In just under 8 months my life is unrecognizable, as is my reflection that on some days is just too hard to look at.
You can spend 9 months physically preparing for your baby’s arrival, buying all the essentials and caring for your body ready to give birth but nothing can prepare you mentally. He’s not even born yet and I already feel as though I’ve had to take on more challenges mentally over the past 9 months than I ever imagined.
I’m so excited to be having this baby, in fact having a family has always been my biggest life goal. But I could never have imagined how held back I would feel. In a world with social media, I’ve watched friends post pictures of their travels and new inspiring places popping up on my feed daily. I watched colleagues taking trips I wished I was joining them on and, exciting projects developed at work that I could no longer be a part of. I felt so low some days that for a while I refrained from social media, rarely looking at Facebook and avoiding Instagram altogether. I felt bad for the radio silence to you guys but I was unsure how I could share my mixed feelings appropriately.
Preparing for motherhood
As I now sit writing this I am just days away from meeting my new little traveling partner, and while it has been a rough 9 months, I’m excited to start this new chapter of my life and I hope you’ll stick around and follow us on this new journey. While I keep telling myself that this break in traveling is temporary, it’s certainly been a hard pill to swallow. When you fall pregnant, people always tell you that you need to prepare yourself that your life will change, but how much it changes is never really apparent to you until you’re living it. I still have an aching urge to travel but I’ve come to accept my feelings and realize this small human will need to be my priority for a while.
What will happen to your blog?
Ah the big question! The Wandering Wanderluster has always been about my travels and solo trips and I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about what will happen and how having a baby will impact my blog and future travel plans. Bt you’ll be pleased to know I’m not going anywhere and in fact, I hope my blog will evolve and grow, as I hope (optimistically) I’ll have time to catch up on some writing and make some much-needed improvements while I am on maternity leave, but we’ll see how that goes! 😉
I am not about to transition into a mummy blogger or spam you with hundreds of pictures of our son. Travel is the one thing that has given me so much joy, independence and personal growth that I have no plans or desire to give that up. However, my newly formed family will be a huge part of my life so naturally, you can expect mentions of family life and traveling with a baby to appear occasionally on this blog. I will be returning to work in the late summer and how much traveling I will part take in is currently unknown. But I hope you’ll stick around on this new journey of motherhood which I am sure will be my biggest adventure yet!